We Are Broken
by Probably Procrastinating
Summary: Kylie's baby turned out to be Nick's. Nick&Leanne.
1. We Are Broken

This fic is set after Kylie's baby has been born, and the DNA test has proven Lily to be Nick's baby, Nick is out of his coma and he and Leanne are no longer together. Each chapter will be from a different person perspective, probably Nick or Leanne's- but I will let you know who's at the beginning of each chapter .

-Leanne-

I heard the sound of drunken girls, stumbling home, through the open window. I turned over to the clock, 1:47 am. They must have reached their house by now, the noise had gone. I glanced over to Simon, who was sleeping next to me, he was fast asleep, not a care in the world. I rolled back over and pulled the sheets over me again, and tried to sleep.

'Wake up Si, time for school, come on' I urged him to get up, it was 8 am.

I was up, dressed, showered, I hadn't been able to sleep, no surprise there then.

'Do I have to?' He said, a grumpy look on his face.

'Yes,' I said, pulling the covers off him, 'you do. Come on now- up,'

'Whyyyyyyyy?'

'Simon, I'm not arguing with you, just get up,' I could feel my patience running out.

'Fine' he sighed, rolling out of bed and into the bathroom to clean his teeth.

I went down stairs to put his breakfast on, when I was greeted by mum, and her pitying smile.

'Morning love'

I know she meant well, but I was tired of the sympathy.

'Morning' I said, trying to smile.

'How are you feeli-'

'Look, I'd rather not talk about it,' I snapped. My voice sounded harsh, I could hear it myself, but it didnt stop me.

'Look Leanne, you're hurting, I only want to help.'

'Yeah, well if you want to help, can you just leave me alone please I've got enough on my plate at the moment.'

'Yeah, sure' she said, going into the bar to set up. I put two pieces of toast in for Simon, and sat at the table, my head in my hands. The school mornings were harder by myself. I wondered what he would be doing right now. Probably still sleeping. Or starting at the bistro. Or out for a run. Or having a shower. Or-

Just then, Simon came in.

'Ready,' he said, sitting next to me.

'Orange juice?' I asked, taking my mind off him.

'Yes please,'

'Jam on your toast?'

He nodded, 'please'

'Okay' I went to get his toast out the toaster, and poured his orange juice.

'There you go,' I said placing it Infront of him.

'What time do we have to go?'

'In fifteen minutes.' I said, as he took a bite of his toast,

'Okay'

'What a you doing today?'

'Maths, literacy, and I can't remember what else,'

'But you don't need your PE kit?'

'No, that's tomorrow.'

'Okay, I'll get it ready today then'

'Okay. I don't like this orange juice' he said, pulling a disgusted face.

I laughed, 'why- what's wrong with it?'

'Its got bits in it, and it tastes funny. I like the one we have at home'

He took another bite of his toast. I took a deep breath, it wasn't our home anymore.

We reached Bessie street, and I dropped Si off, and as I turned around, Kylie and Max were approaching the school, Kylie pushing Lily in the pram. She wasn't with David anymore. We made eye contact, and there was an awkward silence as I walked past. As cute as little Lily was, I couldn't look at her. She was just a reminder. A constant reminder, of what was gone.

I took my time walking back to the pub, I had nothing to rush for. I had no job, nothing to do. There was no point. I knew I needed to get some form of work, I would do it tomorrow. But then again, I'd been saying that the past 3 weeks. I reached the Salon, and glanced down the street, he was there. He must have just got there. He was walking from his car. He opened the bistro and went inside. He hadn't see me, thank god. He was wearing his grey suit. The one we'd picked out for him to wear to our wedding in Vegas. It was my favourite, but he refused to wear it on Christmas Day, and to be honest, I'm glad now. He had his pink shirt on with it, and his tie. I remember when he bought it in John Lewis. He was moaning about the price, as per. But it looked good, and I convinced him to but it.

I wondered back to the pub, and by the time I was back, Stella had gone to the suppliers, Eva had gone to work, and Karl was in the back- but he was heading out.

'Im off to see Tez, see you in a bit' he made my skin crawl, there was just something I didn't like about him.

'See ya,' I said, sitting down and flicking the telly on. But I wasn't really listening. I could just picture him, in his suit. And his shirt. Then without his shirt, and his suit. Stop Leanne, stop. I had to remind myself, he wasn't mine anymore. I couldn't fantasise like this. It was strange. I love him. He loves me. I want him. He wants me. I would do anything to be back with him. He would do anything to be back with me. But too much has happened. Too many memories. too may lies. Too many fights. After that night, we were broken. We are broken.


	2. What must we do to restore our innocence

-What must we do to restore our innocence-

-Nick-

It was a normal, busy, Friday lunch time at the bistro. It was a lot more work, with Kylie off on maternity, but it was okay. I'd just given table 4 their drinks, when she came in.

'Hiya,'

'Hello!' I said, bending down to the pram she as pushing, to see my beautiful daughter, Lily.

'Y'alright?' She said

'Yeah, good ta, you want some lunch?'

'Go on then,' she smiled and sat down,

'Want a drink?'

'Lemonade ta,'

I got a lemonade and a coke, then sat down with Kylie.

As she read through the menu, I picked lily up out of her pram, and held her in my arms.

'Dont know why I'm reading this,' she laughed 'I know the whole bloody thing off by heart'

I laughed, and Mark came over, 'you taking an hour off?' He asked, politely.

'Yeah, we're just gonna have some lunch, then I'll be back on, but obviously if you need me then I'm only here,'

'Sure,' he said, 'what can I get you?'

I like Mark, he was nice. Leanne always said he was the best waiter we had, she was right.

While me and Kylie were in the middle of our meals, Tina came in, with Rita and Dennis.

'Table for 3 please,' said Tina,

'Oh, 4' said Rita, 'Norris said he'll join us in a bit'

Great. Norris. Local foghorn.

'Just this way,' said Mark

I could feel them staring at us, Tina especially.

'Stop staring Tina' snapped Rita

'It disgusts me' she replied, her eyes still burning into the back of my head.

'Yes, well, that doesn't mean you can just stare like you're at a zoo'

'Why not, she's an animal,'

I could sense Kylie, trying to ignore what she could hear, cradling Lily.

'Oh Norris- over here,' Rita said, waving her hand in the air.

Just what I needed.

Norris saw Rita and headed over, watching us as he walked.

'Whats going on?' He said, turning round to look at us

'None of our business' said Rita

'Well, when they're out in public, they can hardly expect privacy can they?' Said Norris

'Look- whatever's going on is none of our business,' repeated Rita.

'Are they together?' Said Norris, to Tina, as Rita wasn't up for gossiping

Tina shrugged

'Well, have they shown any signs of affection?'

'Nah,' said Tina

'Bet they are,'

'Well it wouldn't surprise me' said Tina

'Yes- but to his brother? He wouldn't would he?'

Tina shrugged again.

'Look,' said Rita 'I've said it once and I'll say it again. It's none of our business!'

She'd said it three times actually.

'What you doing today then?' I said to Kylie, trying to block it out.

'Nothing,' she sighed. 'Might go for a walk later- what time do you clock off?'

'5,' on an early tonight'

'What do you want for tea?'

'Whatevers in the fridge, not sure what we've got to be honest'

'Okay,' she smiled.

Just then, mum came in.

'What the hell do you think you are doing?!' She said, her voice loud.

'Gail,' began Kylie

'Dont you speak to me.' She said

'What do you think you are doing Nicholas?' She stared at me

'Eating my dinner,' I said, trying not to sound too cocky.

'With her?'

'With my daughter,' I said. That was the only reason anyway. I did like Kylie, don't get me wrong, she's a perfectly nice girl. But I don't love her.

Mum let out a cruel laugh. 'Oh yes, I forgot. David's niece,' her voice was harsh

'Mum,' I began, 'I am sorry, I really am. I've told David a thousand times, what else do you want me to do? I've taken Kylie in, providing a good life for her and Lily, isn't that what he wants?'

She rolled her eyes.

'Look, I've taken the blame. I've taken the punishments, I spent two months in a coma, and lost everything I care about. Is that not enough for him?'

'It's wrong' she snarled

'What is?'

'You and her.'

'For the last time - we're not together!'

'Ooh,' said Norris, 'so they're not then?'

'Yeah right,' said mum

'We're not! We're just trying to give our daughter somewhat of a normal life,'

'Our daughter. Isn't that sweet?' She said, patronisingly.

'Gail, stop' said Kylie, 'you're embarrassing yourself'

'IM EMBARASSING MYSELF?' She said, outraged. 'Im not the one sat here eating lunch with my brother in law and his baby!'

Kylie looked down, I felt sorry for her.

'Mum, just leave,' I said, quietly

'I have never been so disappointed in you.' She tried to look me in the eye but I looked away, making it clear I wasn't going to respond.

She walked out the bistro, but everyone was still staring, including Carla and Michelle, who had just walked in.

'What does she want us to do?!' Said Kylie, 'David's kicked me out, Leanne's told you where to go- we've got a kid, why shouldn't we both bring her up?'

'I know,' I said

'Dont get me wrong,' she said, 'of course I wanted this baby to be David's, but you're a great dad Nick, and you're Lily's dad. I'm not going to take that away from you,'

I smiled. 'Shame not everyone sees it like that. I swear, half the people on the street think we're sleeping together,'

'Yeah, well they don't know what they're on about.'

' I know,' I said.

'How about you have her tomorrow- take her out or summert?'

'Oh what so you can put your feet up?' I joked

She laughed, 'no! Cause I thought you might want to spend some time with her, you know, alone'

'Yeah, yeah. I'd like that. Thanks'

'No worries- she is yours too you know!'

'I know,' I said, looking at Lily, who was now fast asleep.

'I could come meet you afterwards if you wanted?'

'Yeah, I'd like that'

'Me too,'

It was strange, my arrangement with Kylie. We were living together, had a child together, got on well together. But we weren't sleeping together, we didnt love each other. It was basically like a marriage without the marriage part. If that made sense.

'You seen Leanne?' Said Kylie

'No,' I shook my head. 'David?'

'No,' she replied. 'To be honest, I don't know what he wants me to do. I've made a mistake and I know that. I've paid the price, and so have you. But what we did doesn't mean he can go putting people in comas. No- I've apologised, but I'm not grovelling. He can do what he wants'

I admired that about Kylie. She had backbone. And she was right. What did they want us to do- live under a rock? David can go causing car crashes, and trashing people's lives, but he expects us to bend over backwards for him? No, in their eyes our innocence will never be restored. David was Gail's new golden boy, and to be honest, I didnt care.

The next morning, I got up and went in the living room to see Kylie, with lily on the sofa.

'Good morning,' I said, looking into Lily's pretty eyes, she smiled, 'morning Kylie'

'Mornin'

After I was showered and changed, I took Lily out for a walk, and Kylie went back to bed. We had a nice day, I took her to the park, we fed the ducks- well, I fed the ducks. We went for lunch, well, I went for lunch. And we had an ice cream, well, I had an ice cream. It was a really nice day, the sun was shining and there was perfect blue sky. As we were walking back down the street, past the rovers, gran came out of the salon.

'Nick!' She shouted, I turned and she came to look at lily.

'Aw, she's looking well,'

I smiled, 'yeah'

'So, er, where's Kylie?'

'At home,'

'The flat?' She tutted, 'Nick, what are you doing?'

I wanted to give her some cocky answer, but I knew she was being serious.

'This is David's family, not yours'

'Kylie, yes. Lily, no.'

She rolled her eyes. I felt ashamed. She was right. What was I doing? Gran was always the one person who fought my corner. But even now she'd taken David s side, couldn't she see this was hard for me too? I'd gained a daughter and lost a wife and step son. I'd taken Kylie in, I was trying to do the right thing. We were trying to be good parents. It wasn't just done on a whim. It had been discussed, thought through. But that wasn't enough for them was it? Well, the whole street thought we were cheating liars. which we are, but people didnt have to be so cruel about it. like i said, we were trying to do the right thing. But we were being treated like dirt. What must we do to restore our innocence?


	3. Worlds that don't belong

_-Worlds that don't belong- _

-Leanne-

I got in from work to hear the phone ringing in the back of the pub, 'hello?' I said

'Ah, mrs Tilsley,' yep, that's me.

'Yes?'

'Its Brian Packham,'

'Oh yeah, everything alright?'

'Fraid not, Simons feeling a bit under the weather. Would you be able to collect him?'

'Er, yeah, sure. What's er, what's wrong with him?'

'Hes been sick and he's stomach is still a bit upset.'

'Ah, okay, tell him I'll be there soon,'

'Will do. Thanks mrs Tilsley.'

I put the phone down, great.

'Oh, hiya love,' said mum,

'Hiya, er I'm off to pick Si up, he's not well,'

'Oh no, okay love, see you later,'

'Yeah, see ya,' I picked my bag back up and headed out the pub. I glanced down the street, to see Kylie, moving boxes out of number 8. I was confused, she already lived at the flat. Our flat. Unless she just hadn't taken all her stuff. But I'm sure she had done. Then I saw Nick, come out too. He had a Spider-Man duvet under his arm, and a bike in his other. Max. Max had been staying with David and Gail. I guess he was moving in there now too. Probably into Simons room. I watched, Kylie turned back as Nick dropped the Duvet. They laughed, together, she helped him pick it up, and placed the boxes into the boot of Nick's car.

Simon. I had to go pick him up. Although, i Knew I had to go, I couldn't stop watching. They came out again, Kylie with more boxes, Nick with a football. He threw it at Kylie's head, she turned round and hit him playfully. My stomach turned. They came out again, with more boxes, laughing. Again. Then Nick came out with two boxes stacked on one and other, and Kylie came out, pushing a pram. Lily's pram. My heart sank. Nick got in his car, and Kylie began to walk down the street. They were going to the flat. He put his keys in and the engine revved. I turned back into the pub, mum looked at me confused.

'I'll have a white wine.' I said, slumping on to the bar.

'What about Simon?'

'I'll have it just before I go,'

'You okay?' She looked concerned.

I nodded. She got me my drink, then gran came over.

'Hiya love, y'alright?'

'Yeah, got to go pick Simon up. He's not well,'

'Whats wrong with him?'

'Been sick' I said, taking a sip of my drink.

'Aw well, he can get in bed when he gets back can't he?'

'Yeah,' I said, downing the rest of my wine.

'Blimey, you downed that quick,'

I looked at her awkwardly.

'Are you okay?'

'Im fine'

'You don't look it'

'Thanks' sarcasm was becoming a second language.

'Do you want me to go get Simon?'

'No, you're alright. I'll do it,'

'I don't mind-'

'Look gran, thanks for your concern but just leave it, yeah?'

I left, I couldn't deal with their pity. Their sympathetic faces. I walked out the pub, and down to Bessie street. No sign of Nick or Kylie.

I picked Simon up and took him home, he got straight into bed. I was down stairs, making him some tea, when gran came back in. Great.

'Is it safe to come in or am I going to get my head bitten off again?' She said, coming through the door.

'Be my guest,' I said, I then realised how cold my voice had sounded. 'Sorry,' I said, 'I didnt mean to jump down your throat before,'

'Oh, it's alright,' she said 'what you doing?'

'Just put some tea on for Simon'

'Thought he had an upset stomach?'

'He does,'

'Leave him, you don't want to upset it any more,'

I sighed.

'You need cheering up,' she said

I looked at her and raised my eyebrows.

'Come on, lets do something!'

'Like what?' I said, with zero enthusiasm in my voice

'Oh, don't know. How about we go out tonight eh? You and me?'

'Me and you?'

'Yeah!'

'I hardly think we're young enough to be "going out"' I laughed

'Fine then. If you don't fancy clubbing, how about-'

'Clubbing?!' I laughed, 'you?!'

'Yes. Me. Anyway, if you don't fancy clubbing, how about we go out for tea. Just the two of us, yano?'

'To be honest gran, I don't feel like going into town,'

'We don't have to- how about the Bistro?'

I looked down, she went quiet.

'Sorry love,' she said sheepishly, 'forgot who I was talking to,'

'Its alright' I nodded

'Where do you fancy going then?'

'Nowhere, it's fine. I'd rather just stay here and drink to be honest'

'Shall I get some wine?' She said

'Go on then'

She went into the pub and came back with two bottles. 'Go on then,' she said 'put t'telly on' we sat on the sofa and put our feet up.

'You know,' she said, 'I think I've got a box of chocolates upstairs, shall I go get them?'

The next day, I woke Simon up, ready for school.

'You okay?' I said

'Yeah,'

'You sure? If you still don't feel well, then you don't have to go in,'

'No, I'm okay,' he said, getting out of bed.

It surprised me to be honest, I'd of thought he'd of chosen to stay off, even If he did feel better.

'Go on then, get your uniform on,'

When he was ready, we began walking to school. But when we turned a corner, they were there, In front of us. They were walking to school, Kylie holding Max's hand, Nick pushing the pram. It was strange. Watching them from behind. They looked like a family. They were all chatting and laughing. It was weird. Almost like our family used to be, minus the pram of course. Simon didn't say anything, I don't think he understood what was going on. It wa s literally like being in an alternate universe. I used to be where Kylie was, Simon where max was, and Nick... Just being Nick. It was like another world. But a world I wasn't part of, Nick's new world, his new life. And us on the outside. But this world, my world without Nick, it just wasn't right. It didn't belong.


	4. Lock The Doors

- Lock the doors-

-Leanne-

It had been another month, and I still hadn't spoken to Nick. I was avoiding him at all times. Well, kind of. It broke my heart, seeing him with Kylie, and Lily, and Max. I did see him though, from afar. I watched him, in a morning, when he opened up and he sometimes went past walking with Lily, and I watched from the window. More than anything I wanted to be by his side, linking him, walking with him. But I wasn't. Then I wondered, was he watching me? Did he feel the same way I did? It felt weird, the thought of him watching me when I didn't know it, but then again, that's exactly what I was doing to him. Trying to get a glimpse whenever I could. But I had to move on, I knew that.

Catherine had said her mates brother was single too, Sam, he was called. She said she'd text me, see if we could arrange to meet up. To be honest, it was the last thing I wanted to do,but I knew I had to. Just to show people, and myself, that I was moving on.

After I came home from work, I had a shower and just shoved a track suit on, and slumped I front of the tv in the back room. Then Catherine texted me,

'Sam's free tonight?x'

I felt my insides churning, oh yes, of Course. Sam. I sighed,

'Sure x' I replied

'8- that nice place we went to in town the other week?x'

'The one on deansgate near ladbrooke's?x'

'Thats the one x'

'Yeah sure, 8?x'

'8 it is x'

I glanced at the clock, Urugh, it was 6 o'clock. Simon was at Peters and I'd planned on having a quiet night in, I went upstairs to have a shower.

Once I'd dried my hair, and curled it, I turned towards the wardrobe, what to wear? I pulled out a black dress covered in lace, the one I wore on the opening night of the joinery. The one I wore the night I slept with Nick. The one he pulled off me, quicker than I thought was possible. No, not that one.

I then pulled out the maroon dress with the black lace over, it was tight fitting, quite short, but not too short. It was the one I wore on my hen night, my wedding to Nick. The one I wore the night Peter came over, the night before I made the biggest mistake of my life. No, not that one.

I went through what seemed like a million outfits, but none of the, we're right. All of them reminded me of Nick. Every single one. I sighed, then pulled one out at random, it didnt make a difference which one i wore, they all made me want my husband back.

Before I left, I glanced at myself in the mirror, my black dress tight around my waist. I put another layer of lipgloss on, and headed down, Steve was waiting in a taxi outside.

When I stepped inside the restaurant, I glanced around. Catherine said Sam was tall, slim, dark hair. Didnt really narrow it down to be honest. When suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder, I spun around.

'Leanne?'

I smiled, 'Sam' he said,

'Hi,'

'You look nice'

I felt awkward, 'thanks' I said, trying to fake a smile.

A waiter showed us to our table, and we were sat by the window.

'Looks beautiful, doesn't it? Manchester at night? All the lights,'

'Yeah,' I said, taking another sip of my wine. As I put my glass down, I saw Sam glance at my hand. Crap, I was still wearing my wedding ring.

'We're separated' I said, laughing nervously. Trying to reassure his confused face.

'Oh,' he said, reaching across the table and touching my hand. 'Sorry'

He was only trying to be nice, I knew that. But all I wanted was for him to take his hand off me. I didnt like it, it felt strange. I laughed, gently trying to move my hand away from his.

After we'd eaten, we were sat drinking for a while.

'Ive had a really nice time tonight' said Sam, looking into my eyes.

'Me too,' I lied.

He got some more drinks in, I could feel myself getting more drunk by the minute. Sam was handsome, kind, funny. What did I have to lose? Nick and I weren't together anymore.

'So,' he said, slightly slurred, 'tell me then- about your husband,'

'Urugh,' I rolled my eyes, not at Nick really, just at everything.

He raised his eyebrows, in question.

'Slept with his sister in law,'

'Whoaaaaa' he laughed 'never heard that one before'

'Tell me about it,' I laughed.

'So you chucked him out?'

'Well, she was pregnant' I said

'Talk about salt in the wound ' he said

'I know right, it was his an all- the baby,'

'Jeez' he said

'So what about you?'

'Me?'

'You,' I said it in more of a slightly seductive voice than I intended, but oh well.

'Well, my girlfriend ran off with some Italian bloke, Mario- I think he was called,'

'Im sorry,'

'Not your fault' he said

'Yeah, I know, I'm just saying, you know'

'You have beautiful eyes,' he quickly changed the topic of conversation

'Why thank you' I said. I could feel it, I was leading him on. The strange part was, I kind of wanted to.

'So, erm, do you, er, want to come back to mine,' he said, brushing his foot against mine underneath the table.

'Well...' I began

'You look far too beautiful just to go home,' he said

Before I knew it, we were walking out of the restaurant and getting into a taxi.

'Coronation street please' I said

'Aw I thought you were coming to mine?' He said, after the driver set off. He edged closer to mine, and put his hand on my leg.

'I really should get back,' I said, turning to face him. He leaned closer to my face, his lips were almost on mine. I didnt know what to do. I wanted to kiss him, I really wanted to. But not because I liked him. Because I was too drunk to think straight, I just wanted the passion back in my life. The passion I had when I was with Nick. But i wasn't with him anymore, was I? Oh what the hell.

I let my lips drift closer to his, they brushed together, lightly. I felt his hand move further up my leg, and his other one, undo my seatbelt. I pulled away, and moved my whole body closer to him, I launched myself at him, sitting on his knee, kissing him, hard. His hands were going up and down my back, and through my hair. We stopped at some traffic lights and we stopped, both breathless. I panted, before leaning into him again, his hands were now around my back, touching my bra. I kissed his neck and he squeezed me tight. It felt really good, but at the same time, it felt disgusting. We pulled apart, and I sat back in my seat, as the driver stopped the car.

'20 quid ta,' he grunted.

I stumbled out of the taxi, and to my surprise, Sam had got out too. He paid the diver and he drove off, leaving us alone. I stood still, I wasn't going to invite him in. I lived with my mum- and even if I didnt, I'd had enough.

'So..' He said, walking towards me, his face practically in mine, 'which ones your place?'

'Look, Sam,' I said, the drink had really gone to my head.

'Oh come on, you can't give me a little, and not the full thing,' he said, pushing me up against the wall at the rovers, it was dark, no-one was around.

'Look,' I said, as he began to kiss my neck, 'Sam stop-' he didn't though, he just continued to smother my neck, his hands pressing me firmly against the wall.

'Sam, please, stop. I've led you on- Sam'

Nothing I was saying made the slightest bit of difference.

'Please, just get off,' I was struggling, trying to remove his hands from around me.

'I mean it- I'm sorry- the taxi should never of happened, just please, please, get off me'

His hands were moving further down now, and I didnt like it. 'Stop' I said as he continued to kiss me. I felt his hand, on my bum, I tried to push him away, but he took his lips further down my neck, onto my chest. My dress was low cut. I was beginning to regret my out fit choice.

'Please, just get off,' I said, trying again to push him off, but then I felt his other hand, join the other one, on my bum. They were gripping tighter and tighter. I felt suffocated.

I felt a tear drip down my cheek, I knew where this was going. Sam began to reach for the zip on the back of my dress, the other one still on my bum. I felt helpless, nothing I was saying would stop him.

'Please' I whimpered. 'Get off- tonight was a mistake, a big big mistake' he was still ignoring me. I felt paralysed, like I couldn't move. His fingers slid my dress open, and he began to finger the back of my bra. We were still in the middle of the street and I had never felt so alone.

When suddenly I heard a shout.

'OI!' It came from the other end of the street, I don't think Sam heard it, as he continued to pin me against the wall.

'OI!' The voice repeated, it was louder this time, coming closer.

'Help' I whispered, I couldn't raise my voice any louder. I felt Sams hand go down my bare back, down my open dress, further and further down.

More tears were coming from my eyes, when suddenly, the voice shouted again.

'GET OFF HER' he reached Sam, and threw himself at him, pushing him into the middle of the road, 'I SAID GET OFF HER!'

I saw Sam fall to the floor, my fingers were trembling, as I zipped my dress back up and tried to dry my tears. I didnt want to look at Sam, I felt sick. I heard him shout though, and yell. The other guy was throwing punches at him like there was no tomorrow. 'Im warning you,' said the voice, again. 'If you don't get your slimy backside out of here right now then it won't only be your lip that's bust. Now get out of my sight' he snarled. 'And don't expect to see the end of this, I'll have the police knocking at your door tomorrow' I stood, my back to the street, waiting until Sam had gone.

A few moments later, I felt a warm, kind hand on my shoulder.

'Hey,' he said, as I slowly turned around.

Nick. It had been him. The voice. I was too upset to even notice before.

I suddenly felt embarrassed, I didnt want him to see me like this. But at the same time, he was the only person who I wanted to see, he was the only one who could make this better.

I looked down, and more tears came down my face,

'Oh Lea, don't cry,' he pulled me into a hug, and I suddenly felt safe. 'Come here' he said.

We just stayed in the hug, for what seemed like hours, but it must have just been a few minutes.

'Sorry,' I said, finally, putting out of the hug. 'What are you doing out at this On my way! Anyway?'

'Finishing off at the bistro, late one,' he smiled, 'Lea, you need to get inside,' his face was concerned

'No, no I'll be fine' I said, wiping my eyes

'Leanne- that guy almost ra-'

'Dont' I said, the thought of what Sam was about to do, all coming back. 'I feel sick' I said, clutching at my stomach.

'Come on, we need to get you inside,' he walked me round the back of the rovers, his hand on my shoulder, this thumb stroking my skin.

I let myself in quietly, and I was shocked when Nick followed me in.

We went in the back room, he sat me down gently.

'Brew?' He whispered.

I nodded, he smiled. He shut the door then went into the kitchen. I took a deep breath. All I wanted was to curl up in his arms. I wanted him to stroke my hair, and kiss my head and tell me everything was okay. I wanted to fall asleep, on his chest, and forget about everything that had just happened and feel safe.

He came back in, with a brew, and handed it to me. 'Thanks' I said, my voice wavered.

'I understand,' he said, sitting at the table- i was gutted to be honest, i wanted him next to me, holding my hand. 'if you don't want to talk about it, but what just happened?'

I gulped, 'I don't know' I admitted. I began crying, he handed me a tissue.

'We went out for dinner... We got in a taxi...' My voice trailed off, my mind cast back to what happened in the taxi. Sam's hands going up and down my legs. I felt so stupid. Like such a slag. I had a husband that I loved, and there I was- getting it on with some random bloke in a taxi.

'I er, I kinda led him on' I said, looking down

'That doesn't excuse what he did, Lea. No means no,' I looked at him, his supportive face.

'Yeah,' I said

There was an awkward silence. If we were still together, right now, we would be sat together. His arms protectively around me, my head nestled on his chest, my arms wrapped around him, as he told me everything would be okay, and that he loved me.

Instead, he was sat six feet away from me, and giving me sympathetic smiles. What did I expect, I'd told him where to go, to do one with Kylie. And dispute my harsh words, he was here when I needed him.

'You don't have to stay Nick, thanks, thanks for everything'

'Its okay,' he smiled , 'are you sure you're alright? Want me to go and get your mum, or Eva?'

'No, thanks,' I said, smiling

'Okay, we'll, you take care of yourself. I mean it,' he said, standing up

'See you later,' he began, walking out of the back.

'Nick!' I said, suddenly, standing up, going after him. He spun round, but I was lost for words. I just stared at him.

'I, er,' nice one Leanne.

Nick moved closer to me, concerned something was wrong. I looked up into his eyes, he was really close to me now. I felt my eyes drift to his lips, back to his eyes, then to his lips again. I felt myself, moving closer to him, but he remained where he was. I felt my lips softly graze his, his warm breath sent a shiver down my spine. I began to kiss him, I sank my tongue into his mouth, slowly, and shut my eyes. I loved him, I really loved him. But he quickly pulled away, as I was about to run my hand through his hair.

'Stop Leanne,' he said, 'you're upset. You've just had a terrible thing happen to you, you're drunk, you need to go to bed. This is wrong,' and with that, he left.

It was strange. He claimed it was wrong, however it was the only thing that had felt right ever since they had broke up. It felt like the rightest thing in the world. I kept reliving it. The softness of his lips, I was in heaven. Until he had thrown me back into reality. I didnt blame him. I'd been vile to him about Kylie, and then there I was, shoving my tongue down his throat. He must have thought I was messing with his head.

I shut myself in my bedroom and locked the door. I didnt want anyone to come in. Not mum. Not Gloria. Not Eva. I wanted to be alone. Well, I tell a lie, the only person I wanted to be with, had just walked out on me. All I wanted was Nick. And If I couldn't have him, I didnt want anyone. I locked the doors to my room, and the bathroom, which also lead to the front room. I didnt want anyone coming in. I didnt want anyone except Nick.


	5. Words I Cannot Verbalise

-Words I cannot verbalise-

-Nick-

I was woken by the cries from Lily's cot, at 5 am. I rolled over, onto my other side, hoping Kylie would see to her. It sounded horrible, but right now all I could think about was Leanne. The way she was struggling as some disgusting pervert was trying to take advantage of her. To see her helpless body shoved up against the wall, and his hands holding her so she couldn't move. And the way she cried, afterwards. How upset she was. The way she kissed me. I felt so bad, I must have led her on. I was only trying to be there for her, she looked so downtrodden and vulnerable. She must of thought I was tying to take advantage of her too, she must have thought I wanted her to come on to me, thought I was messing with her head. She probably hates me now. Even more than she did before.

Don't get me wrong, I wanted to hold her more than anything. I wanted to hold her and tell her everything was going to be alright, I wanted to love her. I do love her, but I wanted to love her properly, not from afar. But it would have been wrong to just jump back into bed with her, after some guy practically tried to push her into it. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was, about Kylie, again. I wanted to tell her that I wanted her back, more than anything. Just to protect her and keep her from harm. But I could never tell her that, she'd just go off on one, going on about how I should of thought about that before I slept with Kylie. I didnt want to rake all that up again. I didnt want to make things even worse with her. So I decided to keep my distance, give her space. I had all these words inside my head, words that might slip out if I was around her, no. Things had to go back to the way they were before last night. I loved her far too much to see her everyday.

That afternoon I was in the bistro, I kept debating whether to call the police over last night. I wanted to. He deserved to be punished. Leanne deserved justice. But at the same time, she might of already called them, I didnt want to put her through it again for no reason.

Just then, Carla and Peter came in, 'hiya' said Carla, as Peter just stared at me.

'Table for two?' I replied, to Carla, but still staring back at Peter.

'Yep,'

'Follow me,'

'Ta,'

I handed them two menus and left them to decide what they wanted.

Behind the bar, I picked up the phone.

'Er Mark, you alright if I just nip into the office for a little bit? I won't be long,'

'Sure' said Mark,

I sat down, in the office chair. Dialling the number for Weatherfield police station, slowly. I then clicked 'call'.

'Hello?'

'Hello, is this Weatherfield police station?'

'It is, how can I help you sir?

'I would like to report an incident that happened last night,'

After I described the events of last night to the police, they said they would go and speak to Leanne, to try and track the man down. I felt relieved, something was going to be done. But at the same time, I knew Leanne wouldn't appreciate me sticking my nose in. And she would know it was me, I was the only other person there. But she deserved justice, and now she was going to get it.

I came back out of the office, to be greeted by a scowl from Peter, typical. Then Kylie came in,

'Hiya,'

'Hey,' I said, 'where's Lily?'

'Oh, with ya gran. I was well surprised when she offered,'

I laughed, I was shocked

'Oh god,'

'I know! Anyways, you want ,me to put a few hours in here?'

'No, no, it's fine. You go home, get some rest.'

'You sure? I don't mind?'

'No, no, it's fine, honest,'

'Okay,' she said 'anyway, how come you were home so late last night? Thought you finished at 11?'

I looked down,

'Nick?'

'It, er... It was complicated'

'How complicated?'

'Leanne complicated' I admitted

'Oh, Nick,' she sighed, 'whatever's happened?'

'Its a long story, I'll explain after'

'Okay,' she said, 'what time do you clock off?'

'5'

'I'll put some tea on for half past then yeah?'

'Yeah, sure, you alright picking Max up?'

'Yeah, thanks,'

'Alright then, I'll see you after,'

'Laters,'

I turned round again, to see Peter, staring at me. Still.

'Peter,' snapped Carla 'stop staring'

I could feel Peter's eyes, burning into me.

'Is there a problem?!' I said agitated

'No,' said Peter in his usual, smug voice

'Good.' I said

'It just amuses me,'

'What does?'

'Nick ignore him,' Carla said, 'Peter, shut up.'

'Well, you know, you've lost Leanne-again! How many times is it now?'

I could feel the anger building up inside me.

'Peter,' Carla snapped once again . He just game me a cocky little smile. I was literally about t hit him when I heard a voice,

'Mr Tilsley?' I spun around, it was the police.

'Oh, hi,' I didn't realise they would want to speak to me.

'Can we talk?'

'Er, yeah, In the office,' I said, gesturing to the office door.

We were sat in the office, and the police were questioning me about what happened with Leanne.

'You rang us, very concerned mr Tilsley?'

'Yes,' i said, 'well, I was. It was horrific,'

'Explained what happened, from your point of view.'

I took a deep breath.

'Well, I was just, closing up. I'd finished and I was alone, I'd done some paper work, and was heading home. I went outside and walked to my car, which was literally parked down the road, when I saw two people outside the rovers. Then I realised it was my wife- we're separated,'

'Your wife?' Said the policeman,

'Yes.. ' I said, hoping this hasn't clouded my statement. Anyway, I continued. 'Indidnt realise what was going on at first, I thought they were just kissing, I didnt do anything, I was just jealous. I couldn't stop watching, and the more I watched, the more I saw that Leanne was struggling. She wasn't getting on to this man, she was being attacked. He wasn't being violent,nut I heard her, asking him to stop. And he ignored her. I immediately ran over, to try and help her.'

'She asked him to stop?'

'Several times, she tried to push him off. But he wasn't having any of it.'

'Okay, thanks Mr Tilsley. Your wife lives at the rovers return pub, is that correct?'

'Yeah,' I said, 'oh- you won't tell her I told you, will you?'

They looked at me confused.

'Its just- she won't want me sticking my nose in. She'll play it down- she'll said she led him on. But I'm telling you, if I hadn't of stopped him when I did, I'm scared of what would have happened. He'd unzipped her dress and had his dirty hands down her back,' I could feel myself getting angry, thinking about that creep, touching my wife. My beautiful wife. Scaring her like that.

'Are you saying it could have been attempted rape, mr Tilsley?'

'Yeah,' I said, 'yeah, I think that's exactly what it could have been'

I watched them leave, to go speak to Leanne.

I was back in this place. This mind frame. I wanted t go with them, hold her as she relived it. Tell her it would be okay. Kiss her lips with mine like they were attached with super glue. I wanted to place her hair behind her ear, and kiss her neck. I wanted to love her, I wanted to wipe away her tears as she cried. I wanted to be the one helping her through this. I wanted to tell her I loved her. But all these things had to stay in my head. They could never be verbalised.

please please review, even if you think it's bad- i'd rather know, than carrying on writing rubbish haha. Thank you to those people who do review, it's nice to hear your comments:-)


	6. I've been waiting for the sun

-I've been waiting for the sun-

-Leanne-

I'd been up all night, thinking. Just about everything. Nick, Sam, Nick again. The police had come to see me today, about Sam. I don't know how they knew, someone must have seen and reported him. They asked me for a description, tall, dark, slim was all I could manage. Not very accurate, I know. They asked me all about the incident in the restaurant, and the taxi. I felt so disgusted with myself, all over him, that creep. I was on the rebound, I knew that. Then they asked me about outside the pub. I felt sick- when they asked me. Just remembering Sam's hands around me, his lips on my neck. Then his hands down the back of my dress, it made me want to vomit. Anyway, I told them his full name, and past on Catherine's details, they said they'd be able to track him down, but I was nervous about what was going to happen next. Would I have to face him again? Go through everything that happened? Relive what he did to me? But although I was nervous, I knew doing something about it was the right thing to do. He might do the same thing to someone else. Someone else who might not have someone like Nick to save them.

There I go again, Nick.

It was strange, when he pulled Sam off me, I didnt even know who it was. I didnt recognise his voice- it was just a voice. I didnt see him punch Sam, I didnt see him come out of the bistro. But his hand on my shoulder made me feel safe, I knew it was someone who wanted to help, even before I turned around. And then his face, his kind, loving face, looking at me, scared and concerned. Then he hugged me, tight. But a nice kind of tight- not a Sam kind of tight. I felt protected, not suffocated. Then the way he followed me in, sat me down, and made me a drink. He was genuinely concerned, and he was there for me 100%. And then afterwards, when he was about to leave. When I kissed him. I felt so stupid, he obviously didnt want me. Not after what I said about the Kylie thing. Not now he had lily, and Kylie, he was probably sleeping with her now anyway. But it felt so good. It felt right. It only lasted about two seconds- if that, he couldn't get away quick enough. But then again, someone said the other day, that they heard Nick shouting at Gail, insisting him and Kylie weren't together. I think it was Norris telling Mary. Yes- it was. They thought I hadn't heard them in the Kabin. I needed to know- was he with Kylie? Or did he feel the same way I did?

I glanced over, to see Simon sleeping next to me. It was 3 am. I needed to sleep. But I couldn't. All I could think about was seeing Nick, talking to him. Asking him, how he felt. I wanted to go right now, and tell him that I was sorry. Sorry for not listening to him, for just walking out on him- not even letting him explain. But I couldn't. It was 3 am. I was waiting for the sun to come up, first thing in the morning I would tell him. I'd go round there, and I'd tel him. Tell him I loved him and I wanted him back, if he was willing to give it another go.

It was now 5 am, and I was still thinking about him. Even though what he did with Kylie was wrong, he was a good man. The best, infact. I'd treated him like scum, that night I left. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised: all I had to do was compare him to Sam, and I knew that I'd chucked away one of the best men out there.

If he did feel the same as I did- if he did still love me, why did he pull away? He could see I wanted him. Maybe he didnt want me to think he was taking advantage of me too, bless him. If that was the case, then it just made me love him more. He didnt want to hurt me, he only wanted to help me. Urugh, I wanted to talk to him so badly. But it was 5:49, and still dark outside. Why couldn't the sun just bloody hurry up? As soon as it got light, I would get up and have a shower, and ask mum to take Simon to school. I needed to speak to Nick- I just had to.

I waited patiently, for the first signs of light, and then it came. The sun began to rise, and I quietly got out of bed. I picked up some clothes and went into the bathroom. I couldn't have a shower, I would just wake everyone up. So I had a quick wash, and pulled my clothes on. I needed to look casual, but not too casual. I wanted to impress Nick, but I didnt want to look like I was trying. Then I put my make up on, subtle but not too subtle. Then I went back into our room, which was slightly lit, but dark, thanks to the curtains. It was 6:30.

I went downstairs, quietly, and put the kettle on. I put two toast in aswell, I was hungry having being up all night. I sat down in the back room, when mum came in.

'What are you doing at this time sweetheart?' She said, still half asleep

I was shocked to see her.

'Its not Sam is it?' She said, coming over, putting her arm around me.

I had to tell her, you know, with the police and everything, but I'd missed out the Nick part.

'No, no' I said, 'well, kind of' I sighed.

'How d'you mean?' She said, pulling up a chair at the table, sitting next to me.

'Well..' Should I tell her? '..you know, when I told you- about what happened?'

'Yeah?'

'I kinda missed something out,'

Her face turned to shock and disgust, 'he didnt-'

I cut her off, 'no, no! ... Not him,' I looked down

'Not him?'

I shook my head

'Im confused,' she said

'You know when I said that random guy pulled him off me in the street?'

She nodded.

'It wasn't just a random guy,' I admitted, 'I was Nick,'

'Nick?!'

I nodded, I felt tears coming to my eyes, thinking about the hug... The kiss...

'What- but- Nick?!' Repeated mum

'Yeah' I said, teary eyed

'What- he decked Sam?'

'Yeah- he was really, really good mum, like, really really good to me. He brought me inside, and made sure I was okay. He wanted to get one of you, but I said no'

'Oh sweetheart,'

'But it got worse,' I said 'I... We kissed'

Mum just raised her eyebrows, and widened her eyes- that's woken her up.

'I don't know... It felt natural, right' I tried to explain

'Leanne! You almost got raped and then he goes kissing you! There's being nice and then there's taking advantage!'

'No!' I insisted, 'I kissed him- he pulled away, he said I was too drunk and upset, it was wrong. But it didnt feel wrong mum.'

'He said that?'

'Yeah...'

'Lea, look, he was right.'

'No but he wasn't!' I said 'I wanted him more than anything, and not because I was drunk, but because I love him. And yeah- I might have been upset, but that's exactly why I needed him.'

'Look, love, this isn't doing you any good. You need to move on,'

'But I don't want to move on! It's Nick I love, and it's him I want to be with. I know that now. That's why I'm up, I've been waiting for the sun. I'm speaking to him as soon as I've finished this, I have t go find him'

'Are you sure that's a good idea love?'

'What have I got to lose? I've already lost him,'


	7. We're at war

-We're at war-

-Kylie-

I heard the buzzer go for the door, what the hell?! It was 7 am. Great. Lily stated crying. Urugh, I flopped out of bed, and went to the phone,

'What?!' I grunted, it was too early to be polite.

'Oh, it's you.' Just what I needed, Leanne.

'What?' I said. What did she even want? Cow. Probably come to have a go at Nick, again.

'Can I come up?'

'Why?' I said, trying to ignore Lily's cries.

'Is Nick up?'

'No,'

'Oh..' She sighed. I knew it. She'd come to have a go.

'So, what can I help you with?' I said, sarcastically.

'Nothing.' She said, right cocky twat.

'Fine then,' I said, slamming the phone down.

I used to right like her, you know, before. But she proper overreacted about Lily. Like- I obviously know it was wrong, and I know David was devastated, but some of the things she said were vile. Dispite what Nick had done. I had the inclination to stand up for Nick- we were in the same boat. He was my friend and we had a child. He stuck up for me and I stuck up for him. But I'm telling you now, Leanne wasn't getting anywhere near him. She'd ruin everything. For one- we wouldn't be able to live here, be a family. And two, she couldn't act the way she had, then expect to worm her way back in. Nick deserves better. No I wasn't having it.

Just then, Nick came out, to see to Lily.

'Who was that?' He said, confused, and half asleep, picking Lily up, and holding her.

Crap. Erm, did I lie? If I said it was Leanne, he'd go running round, seeing what she wanted.

'Urugh, just some, er, yano, them charity collecting people wanting to talk to us,'

'At 7 in the morning?'

'Exactly,'

'Hope you told them where to go,'

'Oh trust me, I did'

'Aw, don't cry,' said Nick, bouncing Lily up and down in his arms

'You go back to bed,' he said, 'I'll stay up with her,I'm gonna open up early anyway today,'

'Sure?'

'Yeah, go on'

'Thanks,' I said, going back into my room.

After I'd taken max to school, I went into the bistro, as Nick had taken Lily with him.

'Hiya'

'Oh, hi' he said, 'she's just there'

'Oh yeah,' haha, I laughed, 'she been alright?'

'Fine- good as gold'

'Aw good, hello Lily baby!' I gazed at my daughter, who was blissfully sleeping.

'Want a coffee?' Asked Nick

'Go on then,'

'Max get off alright?'

'Oh yeah, fine'

'Good' said Nick, when suddenly she came through the door, great.

She gave me daggers, I gave them back.

Nick looked floored, as though Angelina Jolie had just walked through the door.

'Leanne...er hi,'

She smiled at him, Urugh she irritated me so much.

'Sorry if I disturbed you this morning,' she said, sheepishly.

Nick just stared at me, shit. Then Leanne stared at me.

'What?!'

'Oh,' said Leanne 'you didn't tell him did you?'

'Why should I,'

'You know what Kylie-' I couldnt be arsed with her

'Oh just shut up Leanne!'

'Don't tell me to shut up, I didnt sleep with your husband,'

'Oh it were right good you know,' I felt like winding her up. I could see the anger building inside her, she looked like she was going to cry.

'Kylie!' Snapped Nick

'Well it was. I enjoyed it, shoot me'

'Don't tempt me' Leanne snapped

'Look, just leave it yeah?' Said Nick

'She can't just come in here shouting the odds!' I exclaimed

'I asked you if nick was up. You said no.'

'Oh, what so you could come and tell him that you wish he'd died in the crash again?!'

I regretted it as soon as I said it. Not for her sake, but for Nick's. he looked down, and she looked at him lovingly, Urugh why was she so annoying?!

'Sorry, I didnt mean that. Look- I'm gonna get off, I'll see you in a bit'

I decided I needed to leave, it was too awkward. But I still hated Leanne, and this war wasn't over. She wasn't going to get Nick back, not on my watch.


	8. Tell me why we live like this

-Tell me why we live like this-

-Nick-

She looked so beautiful. Just wearing her jeans, but that didnt matter, she looked perfect, as always. I couldn't stop staring at her.

'Can we talk?' She finally said, her voice soft.

'Yeah, sure,' I said, not moving, still gazing at her. She met my eye, crap, I'd been staring at her too long.

'Sorry,' I said quickly, turning to reach two cups, 'want a drink?' She nodded.

When I'd made us a cup of coffee, I went over to the table where Leanne was sat. She smiled at me, again. God, she was so beautiful.

'Im sorry,' she said.

Wait. What was she apologising for?

'Ive been such a cow,' the Kylie thing. I could see her starting to get upset.

'Give over,' I said, I hated seeing her upset like this. 'I deserved it, every last word'

'No you didn't,' she said meeting my eye. There was a moment of silence as we shared eye contact.

'Are you... You know, okay?' I said

She looked down quickly, tears forming in her eyes, and she nodded.

'You don't look it,' she didn't,

'Im fine' she said, but, I knew she was only putting a brave face on.

'Are you sure?' I said.

All I wanted more than anything, was to scoop her up in my arms and never let her go. But I couldn't. I kept thinking to myself, tell me why we live like this. Why. But then I remember, lily. My precious little girl. My beautiful daughter, who, sadly, wasn't my beautiful wife's.

'Yeah,' she said, 'but I wouldn't be, if it wasn't for you,' she began to slide her hand across the table, I wasn't ready for this. Here it comes, almost, and there it was, her hand gently resting on top of mine.

'Don't be daft,' I said, 'it could of been anyone who pulled Sam off. It just happened to be me,'

'Well I'm glad it was,' she said, she began to move her hand, so it wasn't just resting on mine, it was sort f holding it.

'I just wanted to say thank you, you know,' she continued

'I only did what anybody would've done' I said, trying to play it down.

'Yeah, well, nobody else would of made me feel safe, like you did,'

Wait. What was going on? Did she want me back?

Jesus. I wasn't expecting this. Not at all. I mean, I wanted her more than anything. But we couldn't. Not with Lily, and Kylie, and the Sam thing...

'All I did was get you a brew,' I tried to laugh,

'No, no you didn't,' she insisted. 'You... You made me feel safe. And when you'd gone, I felt scared again. You're the only person who could have made it better,'

'Yeah, and I'm the only person who you hate the guts of' I wasn't being serious, but it was true anyway. I think.

'Don't be daft,' she said, a tear began to fall down her cheek, 'Nick I don't hate you. I love you,'

Oh my god. Was I hearing right? I didn't know what to do, I love her too. More than anything, but we couldn't possibly just pick up where we'd left off, too much had happened.

I moved my hand from hers, and put it to her cheek, and wiped away her tear with my thumb.

'I love you too,' I said, keeping my hand, gently placed on her face. She moved hers to cover mine, still on her cheek, it felt just like old times. Like nothing was wrong.

I could feel myself, leaning in, closer, and closer towards her, I couldn't stop myself. I could feel her, leaning in to me too, slowly. The hand I had on her cheek, was now drawing her face closer to mine, we were millimetres away from each other now, our noses almost touching. I gazed at her lips, and I thought of the other night. Although it would have been wrong to kiss her back- it felt amazing. And then she leaned closer to me, and placed her lips on mine, and closed her eyes. The kiss was gentle, soft. I put the hand on her cheek, through her hair, and kissed her back.

We slowly pulled apart, and she smiled at me, 'god, I've been waiting all night to do that,' she laughed.

She stood up, and came and sat on my lap, sideways. Her legs crossing mine and her arms wrapped around my neck, her head resting on my shoulder. I put my arms around her waist. I looked at her, and smiled, she leant her head forward, so our foreheads where touching, I leant up, and kissed her. We pulled apart, she smiled. Then she kissed me. Then we pulled apart, and I kissed her. She laughed, and then kissed me again. I laughed then kissed her, again. She kissed me again, so I kissed her- again. She giggled.

It was amazing to see her laugh, her beautiful smile. After seeing her cry the other night, all I wanted to do was make her happy. And now, I think I had.

'I love you,' she whispered

'I love you too,' I said, it was true. But I knew this wouldn't work. She hated Kylie, the mother of my child. I knew what I'd done was a terrible thing. Even if she said she could forgive me, I could never forgive myself. But I couldn't tell her that now, not now I'd kissed her. Not now she was in my arms. But I had to. It wasn't fair, I had to tell her, before things went any further.

'But it's complicated,' I admitted. I felt her fingers, gently, interlock with mine. Oh god. I was going to break her heart, I was going to break my own heart. Why did we have to live like this? I hated being apart from her. But I knew being with her was wrong, I'd hurt her too badly. I had Lily to look after, it just wouldn't be fair on Leanne.

'Lea, it's too complicated,' I said, looking away from her.

'I love you, you love me. What's so complicated about that?' Her voice was still soft.

'Everything' I said, she didnt say anything. 'Lily-' I began

'Oh Nick I don't care about Lily-' she interrupted me, 'I didnt mean it like that,' she said. 'I just mean, we can make it work- we can, all you have to do is say the word,'

'We can't Leanne. Not really. It's always going to be hanging over us,'

'I thought you wanted this?... Us?...'

'I do,' I said, 'I do,' tightening my arms around her, 'but it's not fair, too much has happened'

'I don't care Nick. All I want is you,'

'Youre all I want too. But the thing is, you're not all I've got anymore. I've got lily, max and Kylie. I can't expect you to be fine with that.'

'I don't care about what happened with Kylie,'

'You don't mean that,'

'I do.'

'Well I care, I hurt you and I was cruel and selfish. I could never forgive myself Lea,'

'So you're saying you're never going to forgive yourself? We're never going to get back together?'

God. This was harder than I thought.

'Believe me, more than anything, I want to. But just, not yet. I need time to make arrangements with Kylie, you've got the Sam thing going on. It's too soon'

I could see her shutting down, great nice one Nick. I had thrown her forgiveness back in her face. I'd broken her heart, I could tell.

'Im sorry Lea' I whispered

She nodded, tears coming from her eyes. 'Me too,' she said.

We sat in silence, still in our embrace. When she said,

'Tell me - when its not too soon anymore,' I looked at her. She was deadly serious about us getting back together. 'Tell me when it's not too soon anymore. And we'll make it work. We can, I promise,'

I nodded. 'Youve got to believe me when I say I love you'

'I do,' she said 'because I love you too. And the other night- our kiss, it made me realise more than anything. But can we still be friends Nick?'

'How can we still be friends when you know all the time I'm talking to you, all I'll be wanting to do is kiss you?'

'Fine my me, kiss away' she said, a smile forming on her face, I loved her sense of humour.

'Im being serious,' I said

'So am I,' she winked at me. ' no I mean it. I need you Nick. If I'm going ahead with pressing charges against Sam, I'll need you by my side. Even if we're not sleeping together, you're support means everything to me. I don't know how I'll do it without you.'

'Of course I'll be there for you,' I whispered. She leaned in, to kiss me, again. I closed my eyes and held her tight. Her lips were soft, heavenly. They felt like home, where mine belonged. Her arms tightened around my neck, we were still locked I'm our kiss. I rested my hand on her back, it was perfect.

We reluctantly pulled away. And she rested her forehead on mine.

'Thank you,' she said.

I kissed her, I knew this would be the last time. In a long time. I kissed her with every ounce of passion and love I had. And she kissed me back, in the same way. It lasted for what seemed like forever, until the bistro phone rang.

'Ignore it,' I said, leaning into her again. We kissed again, and when we pulled apart, she stared into my eyes.

'So you do that then expect us to be just friends?'

'Sorry,' I said, 'couldn't help myself,'

'I love you,' she said. 'Let me know, remember? When you're ready,'

'I will' I nodded, 'don't worry,'

'And don't leave it too long' she joked 'not sure how much longer I can go without a kiss'

I laughed.

That night, after I'd locked up the bistro, I went home, to find Kylie. Max had gone to bed, Lily was sleeping.

'Hiya,' she said

'Why didnt you tell me Leanne had come round?'

'She didnt!'

'Kylie,' I knew full well it was Leanne.

'Look, Nick, all she was gonna do was come round here and have a go at you. I did you a favour,'

I sighed, why were things so complicated? I liked Kylie, and I loved Leanne, but they hated each other, and with good reason. Me. I slumped on the sofa next to Kylie.

'What she say then?'

'She wants be back'

Kylie rolled her eyes.

'What?' I said

'Shes just messing with your head Nick, she'll do the talk, get you to kick me out, get you to dump Lily, then she won't come back, not really.'

'It wasn't like that'

'Whatever,'

'It wasn't, we almost did- get back together,'

'How do you mean?'

'We kissed. A lot.'

Kylie just stared at me. 'I love her Kylie'

'Fine, you do what you want to do. But don't come crying to me when it all goes wrong again. When she tells you she wishes you were dead. You know, because that's what you say to someone you love isn't it?'

'She was upset,' I tried to justify Leanne's actions, the night she found out about Kylie.

'Fine, go make her feel better then,' Kylie's voice was cold. 'Im telling you Nick, all she'll do is mess you about.'

'Im the one messing her about,' I said 'I snogged her face off then told her I wasn't ready to get back together,'

'Good.'

'I don't know what to do Kylie,'

'What did you say to her?'

'That I love her, but I'm not ready. We're still friends though,'

'Then just leave It for a bit then. If you change your mind again then you really will be messing her about.'


	9. Keep Me Safe Inside Your Arms LikeTowers

-Keep me safe inside your arms like towers-

-Leanne-

I got a call from the police, they wanted me to go down to the station.

'Everything alright?' Said mum, as I began walking out the Pub.

'Yeah, er, the police just rang'

'Oh?'

'Yeah, they want me to go down to the station,'

'Oh right, do you want me to come down with you? I'm sure Tina can manage. Tina!'

'Oh, no- it's fine,'

'Tina!'

'Honest mum, it's fine, I'll be back in a bit,'

'Oh, okay' she said, as I hurried out the door, I didnt want her to come with me. I made my way down the street, down to the bistro.

'Hi,' I said, walking in, he spun round, quickly.

'Oh, hi!' He said, obviously trying to contain his excitement, but to be honest, he couldn't of made it more obvious if he'd of tried bless him.

'Can I, er, get you a drink?' He said, a hopeful smile on his face.

'Er no... I... I've just had the police on the phone,' his face suddenly turned from cute to concerned.

'Whats happened? Are you okay?' He began to walk round to the other side of the bar.

'Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, it's just they've asked me to go down to the station. I was wondering... If you'd come with me?'

His face softened and a warm smile spread across his face, 'of course I'll come with you'

We pulled up at the police station, and got out of Nick's car. It had been weird, the car journey, we had travelled in it so many times, together. Together, together. And that car journey, was strange. We were getting along, well- really well. But we weren't together. He didnt give me a kiss when the car stopped at the traffic lights, we didnt talk about normal stuff. Well, we did, general stuff, general talk, but not the normal stuff we usually talk about.

As we walked to the station, from the car, Nick was walking very close to me. He held the door open for me as we went in, and walked with me to the desk.

'Hiya, I'm Leanne Tilsley. Er, PC Collins asked me to come down,'

'Take a seat,'

We sat down on two chairs,

'You okay?' He said, putting his arm around me. It was amazing, having his support. Even if we weren't back together, we were just friends. We were friends who loved each other, friends who were in love. And I hoped one day, we could drop the just friends part, and get back to the in love bit.

'Yeah,' I smiled, no matter what was coming, I knew I would be okay, I had Nick beside me. And with his support I felt safe.

'Im here for you,' he smiled

I met his eye, and smiled.

'Mrs Tilsley?'

'Oh, yeah,' I said, to see PC Collins,

'Want to follow me?' He gestured to a room down the corridor, then his eyes flitted to Nick.

'Oh, Mr Tilsley?!' He sounded shocked,

Nick smiled, politely. Wait- how did he know who Nick was? He'd spoken to me alone, at the pub. I'd mentioned Nick, obviously, but they never said they wanted to speak to him, they never asked for a description or anything. I turned to Nick, confused.

He suddenly looked guilty. Why did he look guilty?

'Mrs Tilsley?' Repeated PC Collins

I followed him down the corridor, looking back at Nick. What did he feel guilty about- what had he done?

The police just wanted to go through things, they'd tracked down Sam. To be honest, it was quite tiring, going through it again, it made me feel drained. It dragged me back into the dark place I was in when Sam had me up against the wall. When I though no-one would save me.

After we'd finished, PC Collins followed me back out,

'Can I have a word Mr Tilsley?' He said,

'Yeah, sure... I'll be through in a minute,' he said, looking at me, he knew I wanted to talk to him.

'Okay,' he said, going back into the room,

Nick looked at me awkwardly.

'Go on then,' I said,

'What?'

'You. You're face when PC Collins said your name, what was all that about?'

No response.

'How does he even know who you are?' I was genuinely confused.

'Look, I thought I was doing the right thing,' he said

'What?' What was he going on about?

'It was me- who shopped Sam into the police,'

Oh my god. It was him. Of course. Why didnt I click? He told Sam he'd get the police on him, and he had. I was about to respond, when PC Collins popped his head round the door,

'Mr Tilsley?'

Nick looked up, then back at me, before going down the corridor.

After what seemed like forever, Nick came out of the office, and walked towards me, I stood up.

'They, er.. Just wanted a statement, again,'

'Again?'

'Yeah, I... I gave one last week, before they spoke to you,'

'Why didnt you tell me?'

He laughed, 'you said you wanted me dead remember?! I didn't really think you'd want me poking my nose into your business,'

'I never meant that. You know that.'

'Sounded pretty convincing at the time'

'Im sorry, I was upset, but I never should've said that. I'm glad you rang them, the police, I mean,'

He smiled 'it's alright, wasn't going to let him get away with it,'

'Thanks. You didnt have to stick up for me, not after what I'd said to you,'

'You're my wife, I'm always going to stick up for you,'

When we got back to the street, he invited me into the Bistro for a drink.

'We're supposed to be opening for lunch soon, but I can put it back half an hour if you fancy a coffe? Or something stronger?'

'Its okay,' I said

'Oh go on, have a wine- I will if you will'

'Oh go on then. You're a bad influence you are!'

'Fine then, don't,'

'No, no, you've twisted my arm now,'

We went in the bistro, and Nick went to get us a drink, I sat in a booth and waited for him.

'Oh, hi Leanne,' said Mark, he looked surprised to see me,

'Hiya,'

'Wasnt expecting to see you,'

'No, well, life's full of surprises,' I laughed

'Mark- take half an hour off, we're pushing lunch back to half past,' Nick interrupted

Mark looked at me and sensed we wanted to be alone, 'oh, okay, er, yeah, er I'll just go get Millie,'

They both left, quickly, leaving us alone. I'd had time to think. About what Nick said. Dispute what happened the other day, he still thought I hated him. I'd still hurt him, by what I'd said. He might have slept with Kylie, but he didnt deserve the abuse I'd hurled at him.

'Ive been thinking,' I said, as Nick sat next to me, 'about what you said,'

'What did I say?'

'About me, wanting you dead, Nick you know I never meant that, never'

'I thought we'd gone through this, the other day?'

'Yeah, well. I mean it, I never ever meant it, I just said it, you know'

'I know,'

'No but I shouldn't of, I'm sorry,'

'I shouldn't of slept with Kylie, but I did. It didnt mean anything, I just did it. I know what it's like to react in the heat of the moment'

I felt bad. He'd slept with Kylie, and I'd been vile to him. We'd both done wrong. They cancelled each other out. I'm glad Nick was my friend, he was one of the best anyone could wish for.

'Thank you, for being there for me today, it meant a lot,'

'It was nothing, don't mention it,'

'No, it was. Thanks'

He smiled, 'my pleasure.' Then he spoke quickly- 'well, not the police, but spending time with you'

I smiled. To be honest, I'd been thinking of excuses to see him. I missed him, all the time. All the time.

After we talked more, I stood up, ready to leave.

'I'm glad were friends lea,' he said

'Yeah, me too,' I said, 'better than nothing,'

'Yeah...' He said. He walked over to me, and pulled me into a hug. I let myself fall into him, completely. He held me tight and I shut my eyes, my body close to his. I felt his arms tight around me, his head resting on top of mine, his breath slightly blowing a single strand of my hair. I felt safe. I knew he said we were only friends, but it meant more than that- to both of us. I could tell. I could tell he felt the same way I did. I just couldn't wait for things to get back to normal. I just had to wait, wait till Nick was ready. But I just wish he could keep me safe in his arms like towers, like this, forever.


	10. We just want to be whole 1

-We just want to be whole 1-

-Nick-

A few days later, Leanne rang me, early in the morning.

'Hello?' I said still half asleep

'Hi, Nick, it's me'

'Oh-hi,' I said, realising it was her, and sitting up in bed, our bed.

'Is it, er too early to come round?' Her voice sounded shaky

'Er, one sec,' I got up, and checked the flat, Kylie, Max and even Lily were sound asleep.

'Can I come to you?' I said, knowing Lily would be due to start striking any minute.

'Yeah,' she said, 'but Nick,'

'Yeah?'

'Be quick,' she sounded upset

'I will,' i said, to reassure her, 'don't worry, I'll be there'

I shoved some clothes on quick, just some jeans, a top and a hoodie. I brushed my teeth, then headed out the door. I walked down the street, quickly. I passed Peter and Carla, heading to the factory. Opening up a bit early weren't they?

Anyway, I carried on down the street, and when I reached the pub, I knocked on, and Leanne opened the door. She had tears in her eyes and she just had her track suit on. Her hair was shoved up and she had no make up. Not that that bothered me, but she looked sad.

'Everything alright?' I said, she looked really vulnerable

'Come through the back,' she said 'no-ones up,'

We got into the back, and she sat down at the table.

'Want a drink?' I said

'Oh sorry, it's my house, I should be offering you a drink,'

'S'alright, course of habit' I smiled, 'coffee?'

'No ta,'

'me neither,'. Said, sitting next to her. 'Now what's wrong?' I reached for her hand across the table. I knew we were trying to be just friends, but it was proving harder than I thought.

Her face fell and tears began to form in her eyes, she looked down. I tightened the grip on her hand, to show her I was here for her, no matter what.

'Sam,' she sobbed, 'it's Sam,'

'What about him?'

'Theyve let him go. They're not taking any father action'

'What?- why?!'

She just cried, and shrugged her shoulders.

'Oh, lea,' I said standing up, as she did the same, and pulled her into my arms.

'Have they said why?'

'Well he didnt do anything did he? Not really,'

'Lea- he almost raped you!' I didn't want her to think what he had done to her was acceptable.

'Yeah, but he didnt did he. That's all they care about. I led him on, it was just a misunderstanding,'

'So you're telling me that he supplied you with booze, became a shoulder for you to cry on, got you to come onto him and then just "misunderstood" when you asked him to stop?'

'Yeah... But you should of seen me Nick. Oh my god, I'm so ashamed of myself,'

'Why?!'

'I don't even want to think about it,'

'Tell me, come on Lea, you can't keep things bottled up'

'...I was all over him- in the taxi,' she looked down, 'it was so, so bad,'

'It can't of been that ba-'

'It was Nick. You should have seen me,'

'Ew Dont think I'd of wanted to to be honest,'

Maybe I shouldn't of said that.

'What do you mean by that?'

'I just meant with another bloke, you know, you... And him...'

'Yeah, what ever,'

'Why what do you think I meant?!'

'Whatever Nick- just go,'

'Go?! What the hell, why do you want me to go?'

'Because you think I'm a slag. Don't you?!'

'No!'

'You broke my heart and then you give me some filthy look when I go on the rebound!'

'Erm I never meant it like that Lea- and you know it!' I could hear my voice getting louder and louder, almost as loud as hers.

'Well you know what, give me all the disgusted looks and comments you like because I'm not the one who slept with my sister in law.'

'Yeah and I'm not the one who used to have sex with people for money!'

'Are you seriously bringing that up?!'

'Well it's true, I'm married to a prostitute. What does that say about me eh?'

'Oh yeah, innocent Mr '

'At least I'm not an arsonist'

'No-one got hurt!'

'Oh no, you never intended to kill anyone, just claim a load of money. Like the lottery scam take 2,'

'At least I don't set killers on people,'

'Oh no, you're too busy snorting up crack and having affairs with your boyfriends parents!'

We were yelling at each other, hurling any insult we could think of. Just chucking them at each other like toys out of a pram. Even though I was saying all these horrible, cruel, hurtful things to her, it was only out of anger. I loved her more than anything, and I had messed up my chance to get back with her. i know she said she'd wait, but i wanted her now. i wanted to help her through this. but I'd just be messing her about. Having Lily was complicated. But at the same time I loved her and it felt like half of me was missing without her. I just wanted to feel whole again.

Just then, Stella came in.

'What the bloody hell's going on in here?!'


	11. We just want to be whole 2

Sorry this is a short chapter, I will update soon and the next one will be longer:-)

-We just want to be whole 2-

-Leanne-

Just then, mum came in.

'What the bloody hell's going on in here?!' She said, still half asleep.

'Well?' She said, looking at me, then Nick.

'Nothing.' Said Nick. 'Im just leaving.'

'Yeah and while you're gone have fun with Kylie' I screamed, as he walked out the door, slamming it.

'What's happened?' Said mum, still in a state of confusion.

I just began to cry. I couldn't stop. She came and put her arms around me as I sobbed on her shoulder.

'Come on,' she said, as I sat down on the sofa, 'whatever's happened now?'

'I don't know' I sobbed

'It started off well and then... I don't know he just said something in a right horrible voice. You know,'

'What did he say?'

'You know, I can't even remember. It was just the way he said it, the way he looked at me,'

'So you started an argument?'

'Look, you didnt see his face ok,'

'Why?'

'He proper looked down his nose at me, like he looked at me like I was a right slag.'

'Oh Leanne he doesn't think you're a slag. Anyone can see he thinks the world of you, even if you aren't together anymore,'

'Come off it'

'Leanne it's true! Everyone can see it. Why don't you just give him another chance, eh?'

'I want to. I have done,'

'What? What do you mean?'

'The other day...' I sighed

'What about the other day?'

'We almost got back together, but he wasn't ready, you know with the Lily compilation and stuff,'

'So you almost got back together then go screaming at each other?'

'Im just so frustrated mum,' I admitted, 'they've dropped the Sam thing and all I want right now is Nick, here with me. But because of that night he slept with Kylie, everything's gone wrong! I just want him here but he's not and I can't cope without him,' I blurted everything out too quickly for even myself to make any sense of it.

'So why don't you just tell him that?'

'And pressure him even more?! We'll never ger back together then!'

'Or, you might get back together now...'

'No, he's already said he's not ready. 'He can't forgive himself' but I just want to tell him everything's okay, and the only thing I care about is us. Not Kylie.'

'What are you going to do then?'

'I don't know' I cried

'Oh love,'

'I just feel like half of men's missing mum. Like half of my heart has been torn out and the other half's just been left there to bleed. I'm incomplete without him and I just want to be whole again'

She hugged me as I cried. The more she encouraged me, the more I knew I had to speak to Nick again, I just had to convince him.


	12. Give us life again

-Give us life again-

-Leanne-

'Do I look okay?'

'You look fine!' Said mum.

I'd had a shower and got changed, mum had convinced me to go and speak to Nick. It was lunch time now and i decided it was time To apologise for starting a fight. I was going to tell him, how I couldn't cope without him. How I needed him. I know I'd already done that, but it was worth another shot, the worst thing he could do is say no.

'Right, I'm er gonna go,' I was so nervous, I had butterflies in my stomach

'Good luck,' she smiled

I made my way out of the bar, which was now open.

'Alright Leanne?' Said Tina

'Yeah good ta'

'Oi,' said Eva, as I was almost out the door

'What?'

'Thanks for waking me up, you know, at the crack of dawn,'

'Oh, sorry' I said, noticing a few people in the pub looking

'Yeah, should be. Nick's got a right temper on him, nearly deafened me the two of you shouting like that'

I saw more people stare, at the mention of Nick.

'Yeah, well why don't you just mind your own business,'

'Kind of hard to when one minute you're all over each other and the next you're at each others throats.'

'Im not listening to this,' I said, storming out, seeing the factory girls watching me from a booth.

I walked down the street, quickly to the bistro. Passing Peter, Carla and Michelle on the way.

'Alright Leanne?' Said Carla

'Oh what do you want?'

'Only trying to be friendly,' said Carla

'Whos rattled your cage?' Said Michelle indignantly

'Ha, no prizes for guessing,' said Peter

'You what?' I said glaring at him

'Well, I'm guessing A it's Tilsley, B it's Tilsley, and C oh wait- let me guess Tilsley?'

'Oh shut up Peter,' I said, walking down to the bistro.

I opened the door slowly, and it was packed, the bistro. I caught sight of Nick, behind the bar.

'Hi Leanne' said Mark

'Oh, hi,' I said, 'I've just come to see Nick'

'Oh, okay,' he said, returning to his customers.

I walked over to the bar, he had his back to me, getting some drinks out.

'Nick...' I said,

He turned around, his eyes all red and puffy. Had he been crying?

'Can we talk? In the office?' I said, he nodded, then led me into the bistro office.

'Im sorry,' he said, 'I was vile back there, I didnt mean any of it,'

'Me too,' I whispered, almost crying.

'I never wanted to upset you. I hate seeing you hurt,'

'It was my fault, I started the fight,'

'No, it was mine. You needed me and I was horrid'

'I still do need you...'

He looked down at me, and stared into my eyes.

'I know we said we were just going to be friends, but it's not enough Nick I need you, I feel like we've got this amazing thing and that it's just... I don't know it's just died,'

'I hurt you-'

'You just don't get it do you? The only thing hurting me right now Is not having you here to make it better, come on Nick, I love you'

'I love you too,'

'Then what've we got to lose?!' I said

'Leanne... I don't know..' He sounded so unsure

'Well, fine then, if you don't want me,' i said, letting go of his jacket and making my way to the door.

'Leanne- no wait, come back,' he said turning round and grabbing my arm.

'What?' I said

'Are you serious, about us?'

'More serious than anything else in my life,' I said

'Well... Then, if you're sure?'

'I am!' I insisted,

'I just didnt want to push you into anything,' he said

'Me neither,' I said, I felt his arms begin to wrap around my waist, I couldn't help but smile. I was about to speak when I felt his lips against mine. And then I didnt care, I ran my hand through his hair and kissed him like there was no tomorrow.

'Does this mean were back together then?' I said, looking up at him

'Maybe,' he said, winking at me,

'Well, if I haven't fully convinced you...' I said, leaning in to kiss him again.

We were in the office for ages, we were so happy. I just hoped he wouldn't change his mind, again.

We came out of the office, Nicks arm around my shoulder, leaning close to me.

'We got a booth free mark?' Said Nick

'Errrr, booth 3 I think' he said,glancing across the room.

'Ta,' he said, picking a bottle of wine off the bar and walking me to booth 3.

'So,' he said, pouring us 2 glasses of wine, 'we are officially, 'together'?'

'Yep' I said, kissing him, he smiled and put his arm back around me.

Just then Gail walked in. Great.

Her eyes fell upon us right away, Nick sighed, tightening his arm around me.

'Please do not tell me I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing.' She said, her voice dry.

'And what's that mother?'

'You. And her.'

'Yes,' sad Nick

'Youve got to be kidding'

'No,' said nick, 'So if you don't mind, we're busy,'

'Oh yeah, sorry, you can't go back to the flat now can you?' She said in the most patronising voice I think I've ever heard her speak in.

Nick didnt know what to say. It was true. Lily was there. Max was there. kylie was there, nick couldn't exactly kick his daughter out could he?

Nick looked down, 'yeah well, we don't need to,' I said, turning to Nick and cupping his face in my hands, and kissing him. I knew that would shut Gail up. By the time we both reluctantly pulled out of our kiss, Gail had gone.

'Nice one' said Nick

'I know' I said, giggling.

'Shes right though,' he said, the smile suddenly fading from his face.

'Hey, we're going to work this out, you and me. Don't worry.'

I was going to make sure everything would be okay. We had things back to normal. Me and him. That's all that mattered. And this thing that had died- was back to life.


	13. Chapter 13

-I'll take the truth and any cost-

-Leanne-

It was weird, we'd been sat in the bistro for ages, just in the booth. A few drinks, just sitting together. Usually, we'd be here, then we'd go back to the flat, have a few more drinks and... Well, you know...

But now, we couldn't. We couldn't go back to the flat, Lily was there, Kylie was there and Max was there. We couldn't go back to the pub, Eva was there, Karl, mum, and half the street downstairs. Not to mention Simon. Oh god, I needed to tell Simon. It was going to be hard, to come to terms with the fact that me and Si weren't Nicks only priorities anymore. He had a daughter, and she came first.

'So,' I said, smiling at him,

'So...' He said, gazing into my eyes

'What do you want to do now?' I knew we didn't really have any options, but I wanted to hear his suggestions.

'I know what I want' to do,' he said, kissing me again, his arms tight around my waist.

'But we have nowhere to go,' I said, when we reluctantly pulled apart.

'I know,' he said, he looked sad. 'Im sorry,'

'Its not your fault'

'It is,'

'Well... We can figure something out,' I said, meeting his eye, trying to reassure him

'Like what?'

'Well... I'm not giving up on us, and we will figure something out. I mean... Is there NO room at the flat?'

'Well, I guess... Max could sleep in the spare room with Kylie, but Lily's in there too. And then Simon's room'd be free, and our room'd bee free- for you know...' He smiled

'Would they mind?'

'They mind? Leanne you're my wife, it's your home,'

'Yeah, but...'

'No buts- it should be you minding them being there,'

'Look, I'm taking you back, and whatever that comes with. I'm having you and if you come with baggage then so be it. You took me and Simon on, so I want to be a step mum to Lily.'

'You don't have to-'

'I want to.'

'I love you.'

'I love you too,' I said, kissing him

'So,' He said, 'when do you want to move back in?'

'Whenever? Tomorrow?'

'I don't think I can wait that long,' he said, placing my hair behind my ear,

'Excuse me I had to wait 8 weeks when you were laid up in hospital mr!'

'Hmmm, suppose I can wait till tomorrow then,' he said, winking at me

'So- if we're moving back in, are things going back t normal?'

'Yeah, they are, me and you. Like it's meant to be,' he said kissing me again for what felt like the millionth time. But I didnt care, I kissed him back, I loved him so much. He could kiss me another million times and it still wouldn't be enough.

The bistro had emptied, and all the staff were getting ready for closing up, including Nick. I was still sat in the booth, waiting for him to finish. After everything was cleared, Mark, Millie and Shane all left, leaving me and Nick alone.

'Well...' He said, walking back towards the booth.

'Well...' I said, staying where I was. He came and sat next to me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, so my head was resting on his chest.

'I love you,' he whispered into my ear. I know it wasn't like he'd never said it before, I mean, he'd said it a thousand times. More- even. But it sent a shiver down my spine. All my hairs stood on edge. It was as though things were just starting out again, it felt exciting. I felt him move his hand from around my shoulder and around my waist, and my back.

'I know,' I said, my face so close to his, I could practically feel his lips on mine. 'And I love you' I said, grazing my lips against his. I kissed him lightly, but before I knew it, he moved on top of me and pinned me down on the booth, kissing me passionately, all over. I reached for his jacket, and flung it across the room, and then his shirt.

'I didnt end up waiting till tomorrow after all,' he said, winking at me

'No,' I said, curled up next to him, after putting my clothes back on. 'Dont know how you managed to persuade me' I joked

'Well, I could remind you?' He said, his lips drawn to mine, as if they were magnetic. I didnt repel though, I smiled as we kissed for the thousandth millionth time- or what felt like it.

'No,' I said, lightly pushing him off, 'you need to get back, and so do I,'

'Yeah,' he said, 'we do. Wish we didnt though,'

'I know,' I said, hugging him.

'I'll see you tomorrow though. And we can tell everyone-'

'People already know, I mean mum does for a start,'

'Yeah, well, my lot don't. And we haven't made an official announcement yet,'

'Oh didnt realise we needed an official announcement. Who are we Will and Kate?'

I laughed, 'more like Kim and Kanye'

'Oh yeah, Kimye are us!' I'd missed his sarcasm

'Excuse me what are you trying to say?' I said, joking

'Well, he's a rapper and she's a supermodel,'

I pretended to be offended. 'I'll repeat- what are you trying to say?!'

'Nothing!' He insisted 'you're far more beautiful than Kim. Or Khloe for that matter. And Kourtney, too,'

'Whatever,' I said, hitting him.

'I mean it! You're too beautiful to be a supermodel. If you were a supermodel then you'd break the lense because you're eyes would glisten too bright and your smile would be too pretty. The camera wouldn't know what'd hit it and boom. It'd be a gonner.'

I laughed, what the hell was he going on about?!

'Dont laugh!' He said, 'I mean it.'

'Yeah, well,' I said, leaning in closer to him, 'you're a better singer than Kanye anyway,'

He raised his eyebrows,

'I mean your rendition of the smiths knocks socks off Kanye west and jay-z'

He chuckled. 'I love you babe,' I said, cupping his face in my hands,

'Now you really do sound like a Kardashian!' He grinned.

I giggled, then kissed him. And I felt him kiss me back. I could have stayed there forever in his arms, his lips locked against mine. I couldn't even describe how I felt. It was just so were back together and all the pain I had been feeling, about Kylie, about Sam, it just disappeared. Because I knew I was rebuilding my life with the man I loved. Even if it did come along with his daughter and her mother and son.

I got home to the pub, to find mum, and gran drinking in the bar.

'Blimey! You're back late!' Said gran

'How did it go love?' Said mum, smiling at me hopefully.

'Great' I grinned

'What? How did what go?' Said gran,

'Nick,' said mum

'Oh why what's happened?' Said gran, intrigued.

'We're back together,' I beamed

'Oh sweetheart!' Said mum, standing up and rushing to hug me

'I want going to tell you till tomorrow, but seen as you're up,'

'Thats great news,' said gran

'Yeah, well, I'll be out of your hair now. We're moving back in tomorrow,' I explained

'Thats fab, Lea,' smiled mum

'I know!' I squealed, 'right, well I'm gonna get to bed. I'll need to pack in the morning and stuff. It's a good job it's my day off!'

I went to bed and got in next to Simon. I smiled. Our family was going to be back together again. I wasn't even anxious about living with Kylie, because it was obvious Nick wanted us there. And anyway, if she got on my nerves I'd just tell her where to go. The only thing I was nervous about, was Lily. I wanted to love her, like Nick did. I wanted to be a step mum to her like Nick was to Simon. But it was just, every time I saw her, all I could picture was Nick, with Kylie. On Christmas night. It made me feel sick. It should of been me and him making love in that bed, not him and Kylie.

'What time is it?!' Said Si, half asleep. I must have woken him up, I was getting our stuff together, ready to take to Nicks.

'Oh, sorry sweetheart, go back to sleep. You've got another half an hour yet'

'What are you doing?'

'Ill tell you after Si, go on get some sleep'

'Tell me now,'

'Si, you'll be tired! I'll wake you up in half an hour.'

'What have you got to tell me?'

I sighed.

'Right, Si,' I said, sitting on the bed next to him, 'listen, we're moving out of here today,'

'Where are we going?' He said, confused

'We're moving back in with Nick,' I smiled

'We're going home?'

'Yep,' I smiled. 'We're going home.'

After dropping Si off at school, I went straight down to the bistro.

'Morning,' I said,

'Morning,' he replied, smiling

I went behind the bar and gave him a kiss. 'What time you coming round later?' He said

'Well, I've pretty much packed all our stuff up almost, I'll just need help shifting it,'

'You've packed? Already?!' He laughed

'Shoot me I'm excited,'

'Cant blame you- who wouldn't want to wake up to this every day ' he said,

I put my arms around his neck, 'haha very funny you'

'Im being serious,' he said,

'Well, I quite liked sleeping in peace without being woken up every 5 minutes by your snoring!'

'I do not snore!'

'Yes you do! Anyway, what time you coming to help me bring my stuff?'

'Well, when Mille and Shane get here I'll come round. We can unpack and stuff, Kylie's taking Lily out for the day with her mate or summert, and Marks working in here later so this place'll be fine.'

'Great. So what time should I expect you then?'

'11:30'

'So... While you're waiting on Millie and Shane... What needs doing?'

'Work!' He said, 'lea we have plenty of time for that later!'

'But I've missed you,'

'You only saw me 10 hours ago!'

'Exactly. 10 hours too long,' I kissed him.

'Aw aren't you sweet,' he said

'Havent you missed me?!' I joked

'Course I have!' He said, putting his arms around my waist. 'Feels weird waking up without you in my arms,'

'I know, I miss using you as a pillow,' I laughed

'Oh thanks, that all I'm there for is it? To be a cushion?!'

'Youre a very good cushion'

'I don't know if that makes me fee better or worse'

'Shut it you muppet! I love you,' I said

'I know,' he said, smiling at me, looking in my eyes. His were bright, big, brown. 'I love you too' he said pulling me closer, and kissing me. I smiled, god I loved him.

It was 11:28, he'd be here soon. I went out into the bar, it was busy actually. To say it was half eleven. The factory girls had the day off, they were all in there with Hayley, Carla and Peter included, they were here for lunch apparently. But they were having drinks before, plenty in Carla's case.

'Drink love?'

'Go on then. White wine ta,'

'What times Nick coming round?'

'Any minute,' I said, I couldn't help but smile.

'Aw, it'll be nice, seeing you back together again.'

'Thanks,' I smiled

About five minutes later, I was still sat at the bar, with my drink when I felt a pair of soft hands cover my eyes.

'Guess who?' He said in my ear

'Hmmmm, let me guess,' I said, giggling

'Jay-Z?'

'Kanye West,' he said, moving his hands and standing next to me so I could see him.

'Missed you,' I said tugging on his jacket

'You too,' he said, kissing me. It wasn't a quick peck, it was a proper kiss. I didnt care who could see, I loved him.

'Want a drink before we start?' I said, gesturing towards my wine

'Go on then, pint please Stella,'

'Sure,' said mum, getting Nick's drink

He put his arm around my shoulder, and mum put his drink down.

'£2.30?' Said Nick

'On the house,' said Mum, Nick raised his eyebrows.

'Were celebrating,' she said, looking at me, then back at Nick.

'Thanks Stella,' he said, tightening his grip around me,

'Congratulations,' she said, then going to serve the next customer.

'Take it you already told her then?'

'Yeah, last night. Not told Eva though,'

'Doubt she'll be bothered now she's with lover boy Jason,'

'Nah, but I still need to tell her,'

'We need to tell her you mean!'

'Course,' I said, just then, gran came out from the back.

'Oh here they are! The happy couple!' Her voice was so loud, she'd attracted everyone's attention.

'Hi gran,' I said, as I could feel the factory girls eyes burning into me.

'Look at you two!' She said

Nick smiled.

'You better not let her down again.' She said, her voice stern

'Gran-' I started, but he interrupted me.

'Dont worry, I'm not going to ever again. All I'm going to do with the rest of my life is make your beautiful granddaughter the happiest woman in the world.'

'Good.' She said, then raising her glass, 'to you two,'

'To us two,' we echoed, clinking our glasses together. He smiled at me and looked in my eyes, he leant in and kissed me. I smiled,

'Love you,'

'Love you too, more than you could ever imagine,' he said,

'Right, lets get your stuff,' he said

'Yep,' we came out of the bar with lots of boxes and bags to go in Nick's car. We went back in to get some more, and Audrey had come in the pub.

'Oh so it's true then?' She said

'Yeah...' Said Nick

'When your mother told me I couldn't quite believe it. Nerve on you Nick, David's in bits.'

Nick fell silent, the whole pub was staring, including Peter and Carla.

'Im sorry,' he said, I could hear the pain in his voice. He had always been the reliable one in his family. Now they were ashamed of him.

'Yes well, tell that David. Doubt it's going to make a difference. So what's going on anyway?'

'Oh, er, Leanne's moving back in.' He said, looking to me, I could see in his eyes that he was uncomfortable. I was about to step in and help him, when Peter butted in.

'With Simon?' He said, loud across the pub

'Excuse me, are you in this conversation? No.' I said

'He's my son!'

'Yes, and he's safe. We're only moving back in its not like we're upping sticks and moving away.'

'What if I don't want him living with him?' He said, nodding at Nick, who was even more uncomfortable now.

'Then he can live with you. If it bugs you that much,' I said, knowing that's shut him up. Carla wouldn't want a 10 year old cramping her style.

'Peter just leave it, yeah? It's none of our business,' said Carla.

Told you.

'Come on,' I said, 'lets get the rest of the stuff,' I gently pulled his arm and we went back through the Bar, escaping Audrey. When we got in the back room, I could see tears in his eyes.

'Oh come here,' I said, pulling him into a hug.

'What am I gonna do Lea?'

'Look, if they can't see past one stupid mistake you made, then they're not worth it Nick!'

'You weren't saying that a few weeks ago,'

'Nick I was in bits. And they will be too. But think about it ok- all the things David's done in his time. Sarah getting knocked up at 13- it's not like what you've done is the end of the world is it?'

'No,' he admitted

'Right,' I said, putting my arms around his neck, 'I don't want you getting upset, okay. From now on its just me, you, Si and lily. Okay. That's all that matters,' I looked into his eyes, which were so full of pain.

He nodded, 'yeah,'

'Yeah,' I said, wiping away the tear which was coming from his left eye.

'Come on,' I said, 'lets go home'

When we got in the flat, we started unpacking all our stuff. Nick had already told Kylie that we were moving back in, the plan was for us to move everything of Max's into the spare room, but it didnt quite make sense:

'Why don't the two boys share?' I said

'What?'

'Well, they can top to tail. Or put the spare bed up for max?'

'Do you rec it'd work?'

'Yeah- Si loves max, it'll be like a sleepover every night. That's how we sell it to them,' I said, grinning at him

'Oh is it now?'

'Yep,'

'Okay then- that'll save a lot of time actually'

'Yep- only our stuff to put back in'

'Lets get started then,'

We began unpacking and it was weird, all the stuff going exactly where it was before. I don't know, it just felt strange.

'Right,' said Nick, 'well that's it' he put the last of Simon's DVDs in the DVD rack, and stood up.

'All done. Like we've never been away'

'Yep,' he said, 'but I've got to tell you- lily cries a lot in the night,'

'What baby doesn't?' I said

'No I know, I just... I know this is hard for you,'

'Look. I love you. And you love lily. She's important to you so she's important to me.'

'Yeah, but Kylie-'

'Kylie's just an inconvenience that I'll have to endure for your sake. But your worth it so I think I'll cope,' I said, winking at him

'You sure you're okay? If you're not, you'd tell me right?'

'Of course I would! Anyway- when's Kylie gonna be back?'

'Not till about 8 I don't think. Her friend was gonna pick max up with her then they were gonna go for tea,'

I raised my eyebrows, 'oh... Right...'

'So...' He said, 'that means we have till 8... Alone'

'Do we now?'

'We do,'

He walked towards me and placed my hair behind my ear with his right hand, while his left rested around my waist. I leant up and brushed his lips with mine, he put both his hands around my waist, and held me tighter, closer to him. I felt my whole body against his and put my arms firmly around his neck, and continued to kiss him. I don't know if we were making up for lost time while we'd been separated, but after losing him, I just wanted to make the most of him while I had him. I knew what life was like without him and I never wanted to go back to that.

I felt his hands run through my hair, I took his hand and headed for our bedroom.

'We need to pick Si up from Kens at 5' I said, looking up at Nick, who had his arms wrapped protectively around my bare body under the sheets.

'What happened to us being alone till 8?' He said,

'Well, I forgot- okay?' I laughed

'Hm, it's okay I'll let you off,' he said

'Its gonna be packed in here with 6 of us,'

' I know, tell me about it,'

'Im serious though Nick. You're amazing with Simon. I want to be there for Lily like you're there for him.'

'Youll be amazing. You don't need to try. And anyway, Kylie's moving out as soon as she can get a place of her own- or moves back in with David. But I doubt that'll happen.'

'Well, when she has, me and you can have lily and take her places at weekends and things,'

'Yeah I'd like that,'

'Me too,' I smiled, 'four of us now, how exciting?!'

'Exciting'

It was soon 4:45, and we needed to pick Simon up. We walked out if the flat, and down the street, to Ken's.

Eva was coming out of Jason's, with Sean, they must have been going to the pub. I saw her eyes immediately flit to mine and Nick's hands, which were firmly interlocked.

'Hi,' I said, as we approached them

'Hi,' she said, obviously unimpressed.

'We, erm- we wanted to tell you before, but you weren't in the pub,' I began 'we're back together'

'Aw, congrats,' she said, trying not to be sarcastic, although she was obviously not happy.

'Thanks,' I said

'Thanks Eva,' said Nick, before she smiled, nodded, and continued for the pub. We knocked on at ken and Deirdre's, and picked Simon up. When we got back, Nick unlocked the door and we followed him in, to see Sam.

I stood still. So did Nick. He was sat on our sofa. How did he even get in?

'Lea go and take Si back,' he said, turning towards me, warning in his eyes.

I nodded, and quickly shuffled out with Simon. And headed back to Ken and Deirdre's.

'who was that mum?'

'No-one darlin, we just need to go back to grandads for a little bit,'

'Why?'

I dropped Si back off and headed back to the flat,I didnt want to go, but I didnt want to leave Nick there, alone. I was scared of what Sam would do. I mean- he'd got into our flat. And there was nothing to suggest a break in. I felt my skin crawl. It made me feel sick.

I headed back up the stairs to the flat, and walked towards the open door of number 8. I could hear shouting, and as I walked in, slowly, I could see Nick. His face all cut and bleeding. Sam quickly pushed his way past me, giving me an intimidating glare, the look in his eyes scared me. It took me back to that night. He violently shoulder barged me out the way and stormed out the door. I looked around the flat, everything was trashed in the living room. Then my eyes returned to Nick, who was now at the sink.

'What happened?' I said, walking over to him, putting my hand gently on his back.

'Nothing,' he grunted

'Well it's obviously not nothing,' I said

'Lea just leave it,'

'No- you're bleeding. What happened?'

'Hes an idiot. You know that,'

'Yeah, I do. Which is why I want to know what he's done to you,'

'Look, leave it.' He said, turning to face me. 'Anyway,' he said 'are you okay?' His voice softened,

'Yeah, I'm fine,' I lied

'Stop lying,' he said

Damn it.

'Come here,' he pulled me into a hug and held me tight.

'He can't hurt you. I won't let him.'

'What did he say to you?'

'That doesn't matter,'

'Nick. Tell me.'

'No, Lea'

'Nick I want to know,'

'He just started winding me up,'

'So you punched him one?'

'You didnt hear what he was saying alright,'

'What did he do to the flat?'

'I dunno, he just went mental. Psycho.'

'So- what was he saying which made you lash out like that?! Your face is a mess!'

'Just winding me up,'

'About what?!'

'You!'

'What?'

'You... He was.. Lea lets not talk about it,'

'Why? What did he say?'

'Leanne look- let's just go straight to the police,'

'The police?'

'Lea he's already been in trouble with them, I'd love to know what they have to say about this,'

'Do we have to go through all this again?'

'Lea! We can't let him get away with it- he was in our flat remember,'

'Yeah but-'

'Lea he was waiting for you,'

'Me?!'

'You! Look, we're going to the police because I won't be able to sleep knowing that that mans roaming the streets, threatening your safety.'

'They're not going to do anything! They didn't last time!'

'I don't care. I'm going.'

And he left, grabbing his coat and shutting the door behind him. I suddenly felt so alone. Sam had managed to get in before, what if he did it again? And what if Nick wasn't here to save me? Crap. I got the phone and rang Owen, my hands shaking, I just wanted Nick to come back.

'Oh hi, Owen, can you change our locks? It's urgent,'

Owen came round and fixed the locks, that way, if Sam did have a key then he wouldn't be able to get back in. A few hours had passed, and no sign of Nick. Just then, Kylie Max and Lily burst through the door.

They looked at me in shock, tidying the trashed flat.

'Auntie Leanne!' Said Max

'Hi max,' I said, giving him a hug

'Wheres Nick?' Said Kylie

'Er, he's gone out'

'Well no,' she said sarcastically

'Hes at the police station if you must know.'

'What? Why?!'

'Sam was here,'

'Sam? That guy who-'

'Yes, that guy who...'

'Oh, are you okay?'

'Yeah. Nicks not though. His face is a right state.'

'Bet it is, bloody hell'

'And he's not back yet?'

I shook my head, just as I heard a knock at the door.

'Speak of the devil,' said Kylie, going to answer the door. Nick came in, his face cleaned up.

Kylie quickly made herself scarce, going to pick up Simin with max, leaving Lily in her cot.

'Your face,' I said

'What about it?'

'Its cleared up'

'Went to a and e'

'I would of done It for you,'

'Oh yeah, I'll just leave it bleeding till I get home,'

'Alright no need to be like that. Anyway, what did they say?'

Suddenly, his face changed from annoyed to a warm, kind smile. He walked towards me, his grin widening.

'You'll never guess,'

'What?' I said., intrigued

He put his hands around my waist and pulled me closer to my hips were touching his.

'Theyve took him in, charged him,'

'What? With assault?'

'Assault, attempted rape and harassment,'

'What?!'

'He came back lea- for you.'

'What do you mean?'

'Because of what happened last time. Now they believe you about what happened. And say he's harassing you, and then they took one look at my face then got him in. I had to make some statements, and now he's in custardy. He can't hurt you anymore.'

'Seriously?'

He nodded. I put my arms around his neck.

'I know, I don't always show it well, but I do love you, you know.'

'I love you too.' He said, 'I'm sorry if I went off on one a bit tonight'

'Its okay, you were angry,'

'I just couldn't bare the thought of him hurting you. I love you more than anything. And the thought of someone hurting you just feels like I'm being stabbed in the heart. Like it hurts me more than it hurts you, watching you get hurt'

'Aw babe,' I said, grazing his face with my hand,

'Just promise me that if you're ever scared you tell me okay?'

'Yeah,' I nodded, 'course I will,'

I leaned in and kissed him, then looked in his eyes.

'Love you,' he whispered

'Love you' I replied, as he leaned in, slowly kissing me. His lips were soft and gentle, I felt the pit of my stomach go numb as I retaliated to his kiss. My tongue moving with his, his hand running through my hair, my hand locked around his neck. Holding his face close to mine. I never wanted him to prise his lips away. But then Lily began to cry. We slowly pulled away, as Nick looked over at her, then walked over to her, leading my over, holding my hand. He picked her up, and began to rock her. I stood behind him, my head on his shoulder, as lily quietened down again, Nick turned and kissed me. And held lily in one arm, and put his other around me. I rested my head on his shoulder and looked at his daughter. She was beautiful, just like him.

I looked up at Nick, and smiled. Things were back to normal. Well, not normal. But they were finally how they were supposed to be. Me and him. Soon Simon would be home, and we had Lily. Kylie too, but she'd soon be gone. Sam was no longer in my life, but Nick was. It was perfect. The truth was, that even when I found out about Kylie, I still loved Nick. And that's what I wanted Nick. I wanted the truth, and I just had to take any cost it came with. But I tell you what.

He was worth it.


End file.
